A few nights ago dreamed that my dad had died. Me and the family were at a pancake house/saloon, with wooden lathe walls. I was sad realizing that I hadn't just lost my dad, but also my best friend. Then, riding in the back seat of a car, with Jaina and my mom in front, I realized that I could still hear him talking. In fact he was sitting in the seat next to me. Mom could hear him faintly, but for me it was like he was there.
Last night dreamed that we were living in a big huge 2nd floor apartment that Laurie the landlord owned. The topic of the day was again lead. She was trying to convince us that their wasn't lead in the apartment.
Then I was at an art gallery, and there were bowling lanes. There was some game they were playing to, where they rolled a ball like a pool ball down a long track. There were to custodian, steward guys who were there talking to me, in kind of an official way.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Saturday, October 13, 2012
The Grape Thief
(First night on prickly lettuce and ladies mantel)
2:30 am
I was staying in a condo, type living situation with CJ and tom. My stiff was back tucked in a room, and there was a beautiful common space. It was artistic. At One point Jaime from One Yoga had asked me to figure out what the air conditioning bill for a yoga space that we shared would be.
But tonight I came home to the condo, and there was water on the floor in my room. There was water dripping from the rafters and pipes, falling onto my clothes, a hundred grey dicky shirts neatly pressed and hung on clothing racks like a store.
Tom and CJ came in, we were all puzzled until we looked out at our common space. The ceilings were 6 feet high, like an office building. A crane that was doing work on the outside of the building had knocked through the wall into our condo. We started yelling, but the operator could't hear us. People and police ran up the stairs, we ran out the back door. I followed Tom into a little side room, but he disappeared. My brother and I were there. the room had a tv, and there were four guys watching tv. A red curtain hung across the wall of windows that faced out to a busy sidewalk. I began opening the curtains, behind which were doors, opened four doors and tried to slip through, brother just slipped through after me. He wanted to invoke a cartoonish japanamation looking spirit, (It reminded me of totorro, or a pokeman). He started to meditate right on the street, but there was commotion everywhere and I told him he'd do better to find a yoga space.
We were in Mexico now, and we walked up the street finally ducking into a yoga studio. The walls were covered with those foam tiles people use to make drop down ceilings. There was a tiny door in the wall in the back and Ben ran straight for it, trying to get in.... I began hustling the mexican woman who owned the studio. Ben came back dressed somewhat like Super Mario, the studio was very excited and wanted him to work the summer tourism season, and bring the money to her. I convinced her with sex energy to bring the money to me. I had her in the pal of my hand. We were just about to leave, and I had been maintaining integrity, keeping myself completely intact, when the thought went through my head that I had someone here who would do anything, sexually. She was lying on the floor waiting, her pussy waited open. I stuck the tip of my penis in it, and felt a rush, coming, lack of control. I engaged the bandhas and pulled out, and stopped the flow. I awoke. I had not soiled the sheets.
Woke up and practiced. 108 breaths breathes Nadi Shoduna. Mula Bandha. Sat in meditation. Took Shavasana. Next thing I remember I was walking up a road with surreal flowers and gardens planted. I was thinking about how sad I am that winter is coming because the plants go away. I will miss them. A fence lined the road and growing on it are the most beautiful muscadine grapes. It is in someone's yard, but out facing the road, so I decide it is game to pick. I eat one. Not amazing flavor, but the color and shape keep drawing me back. They are almost luminous. I pick a few more and eat them. I see a bunch that is shaped like a pyramid. I am almost lucid, but not quite, I am certainly in the moment. I pick the pyramid bunch, and begin walking a little faster, until I find myself lying on the floor in shavasana once more.
First night of allowing myself to practice in the middle of the night went over well. I feel rested and the satisfaction of having practiced consciousness extensively.
2:30 am
I was staying in a condo, type living situation with CJ and tom. My stiff was back tucked in a room, and there was a beautiful common space. It was artistic. At One point Jaime from One Yoga had asked me to figure out what the air conditioning bill for a yoga space that we shared would be.
But tonight I came home to the condo, and there was water on the floor in my room. There was water dripping from the rafters and pipes, falling onto my clothes, a hundred grey dicky shirts neatly pressed and hung on clothing racks like a store.
Tom and CJ came in, we were all puzzled until we looked out at our common space. The ceilings were 6 feet high, like an office building. A crane that was doing work on the outside of the building had knocked through the wall into our condo. We started yelling, but the operator could't hear us. People and police ran up the stairs, we ran out the back door. I followed Tom into a little side room, but he disappeared. My brother and I were there. the room had a tv, and there were four guys watching tv. A red curtain hung across the wall of windows that faced out to a busy sidewalk. I began opening the curtains, behind which were doors, opened four doors and tried to slip through, brother just slipped through after me. He wanted to invoke a cartoonish japanamation looking spirit, (It reminded me of totorro, or a pokeman). He started to meditate right on the street, but there was commotion everywhere and I told him he'd do better to find a yoga space.
We were in Mexico now, and we walked up the street finally ducking into a yoga studio. The walls were covered with those foam tiles people use to make drop down ceilings. There was a tiny door in the wall in the back and Ben ran straight for it, trying to get in.... I began hustling the mexican woman who owned the studio. Ben came back dressed somewhat like Super Mario, the studio was very excited and wanted him to work the summer tourism season, and bring the money to her. I convinced her with sex energy to bring the money to me. I had her in the pal of my hand. We were just about to leave, and I had been maintaining integrity, keeping myself completely intact, when the thought went through my head that I had someone here who would do anything, sexually. She was lying on the floor waiting, her pussy waited open. I stuck the tip of my penis in it, and felt a rush, coming, lack of control. I engaged the bandhas and pulled out, and stopped the flow. I awoke. I had not soiled the sheets.
Woke up and practiced. 108 breaths breathes Nadi Shoduna. Mula Bandha. Sat in meditation. Took Shavasana. Next thing I remember I was walking up a road with surreal flowers and gardens planted. I was thinking about how sad I am that winter is coming because the plants go away. I will miss them. A fence lined the road and growing on it are the most beautiful muscadine grapes. It is in someone's yard, but out facing the road, so I decide it is game to pick. I eat one. Not amazing flavor, but the color and shape keep drawing me back. They are almost luminous. I pick a few more and eat them. I see a bunch that is shaped like a pyramid. I am almost lucid, but not quite, I am certainly in the moment. I pick the pyramid bunch, and begin walking a little faster, until I find myself lying on the floor in shavasana once more.
First night of allowing myself to practice in the middle of the night went over well. I feel rested and the satisfaction of having practiced consciousness extensively.
Friday, October 12, 2012
Other Guy
Dreamed that I was hanging out with Jaina and the teacher from Childrens house 2. She was trying to impress him, and suggesting that even though she and I were married, I was just a "guy" and she could see other people. I listened, not saying anything as they flirted back and fourth, and then finally said
"Jaina, so you are saying that we see other people?"
"Oh mu God," said the other guy, as if I was creating needless family drama and was out of Line.
"Look," I said "I Listened to you talk, now shut up".
Jaina explained that we were living in my parents basement, and basically I understood that she wanted someone who would spend money on her.
I surrendered.
"Fine" I thought to my self. What can I do, although I made an inner resolution to punch the guy in the face next time I saw him.
Jaina and the girls, Misha and I were sitting in a dark room with a window out to the street. They were smoking a small corncob pipe, and I realized that it was "sage". I smoked some too, and the kids stood next to me, comforted by my presence.
"Jaina, so you are saying that we see other people?"
"Oh mu God," said the other guy, as if I was creating needless family drama and was out of Line.
"Look," I said "I Listened to you talk, now shut up".
Jaina explained that we were living in my parents basement, and basically I understood that she wanted someone who would spend money on her.
I surrendered.
"Fine" I thought to my self. What can I do, although I made an inner resolution to punch the guy in the face next time I saw him.
Jaina and the girls, Misha and I were sitting in a dark room with a window out to the street. They were smoking a small corncob pipe, and I realized that it was "sage". I smoked some too, and the kids stood next to me, comforted by my presence.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Lucid like Dream : Aliens and Superpowers
The bulk of my dream took place in underground tunnels. Right before I woke up, Jaina and the girls and I were living at the end of an underground tunnel.... it didn't have a door. The girls had a big bed, and Jaina and Misha had a bed in a separate room off to the side. There was a high tech alarm clock that could teach you about music, and played a really nice song from the 80s to wake you up. The girls were still in bed. I was sitting on the floor awake, because I had had to take Misha to put him in his mothers arms. I heard foot steps coming up the long hallway that stretch to our unit. They were very quiet, like someone was trying to sneak up. I thought it might be aliens. I decided to quietly as I could run to the door way and see who was there. I did. I surprised them, this behavior was not expected, they hadn't realized that I wasn't a sleep. In the hallway was about nine people, one reminded me of a vintage Paul Newman type big easy guy, leaning on the wall. I actually couldn't see them very well because my dream vision was slightly contorted... I don't know that I realized I was dreaming, but I realized I had incredible powers. I blasted a fireball out of my hands, through the tunnel to incinerate the intruders, and then created an impenetrable film to block the door to the hallway and protect my family.
Earlier the tunnel dream had started when my parents and the Donlingers and Jaina and I walked out of a portal into a foreign country, it felt slightly like Morocco, but also slightly Eastern European, Polish or Slovakian. "The Dad" who was with us was a brute of a man. He wore a suit, was balding, a big Russian seeming guy, he saw liquor bottles in a kind of egress, that was almost set up like an alter for liquor. He grabbed the bottles, and we walked down a step, stone street, to a bottom space, where there was a check point with Guards with Sub machine guns. The road stretched across a long flat vastness to the horizon. We took a left. Apparently this was "The farm" in "North Carolina" We walked till we found our selves in underground concrete tunnels. It was the basement of my parents house. My dad piled lead contaminated drop clothes and paint chips in the back corner of one arm. Then we pressed wrestling mats into them to contain them and threw a Hefty garbage can full of bentonite clay on type, with a shovel. I kept thinking we should put a sign up, so future generations new this was poisonous lead.
90s hip hop in a restaurant with Jill And Abby... Felt kind of how French Meadow used to feel to me when I was a kid... So hip so Progressive... There were hip people working behind the counters and there was good music I hadn't heard in for ever playing. Earlier Atmosphere, Gift to Gab, good hip hop. Alex Rand showed up. He wanted water... There was some confusion about who's water was whose, he drank someone else's water, or else had to go to fill up somewhere....
Jaina and I had come up the driveway on the side of the eaton's House. Kai and Lisa were doing a teacher training and we had been brought in to present, or take over or something. Everyone left, and only Lisa and I were left, in a big room, that was either a restaurant or Lisa's office. I told her I'd walk her where she was going.
Earlier the tunnel dream had started when my parents and the Donlingers and Jaina and I walked out of a portal into a foreign country, it felt slightly like Morocco, but also slightly Eastern European, Polish or Slovakian. "The Dad" who was with us was a brute of a man. He wore a suit, was balding, a big Russian seeming guy, he saw liquor bottles in a kind of egress, that was almost set up like an alter for liquor. He grabbed the bottles, and we walked down a step, stone street, to a bottom space, where there was a check point with Guards with Sub machine guns. The road stretched across a long flat vastness to the horizon. We took a left. Apparently this was "The farm" in "North Carolina" We walked till we found our selves in underground concrete tunnels. It was the basement of my parents house. My dad piled lead contaminated drop clothes and paint chips in the back corner of one arm. Then we pressed wrestling mats into them to contain them and threw a Hefty garbage can full of bentonite clay on type, with a shovel. I kept thinking we should put a sign up, so future generations new this was poisonous lead.
90s hip hop in a restaurant with Jill And Abby... Felt kind of how French Meadow used to feel to me when I was a kid... So hip so Progressive... There were hip people working behind the counters and there was good music I hadn't heard in for ever playing. Earlier Atmosphere, Gift to Gab, good hip hop. Alex Rand showed up. He wanted water... There was some confusion about who's water was whose, he drank someone else's water, or else had to go to fill up somewhere....
Jaina and I had come up the driveway on the side of the eaton's House. Kai and Lisa were doing a teacher training and we had been brought in to present, or take over or something. Everyone left, and only Lisa and I were left, in a big room, that was either a restaurant or Lisa's office. I told her I'd walk her where she was going.
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