Associations and Non-descript Knowledge

Very strange dreams, At one point was in "NC" standing on a hill with my dad, yelling across a huge valley to tell my brother and some other people working that Dinner was ready.  There were people on the next hill riding horses, or something, as if they were on some kind of stilts.  They were working in a way that benefitted my family farm.  Then, a Ford mustang tried to pass through the little wooden shed I was in, coming up the stairs, turning right twice and barely squeezing past me.  I thought how funny that this rural mountain community din't have better roads.  As I went down the hill, I was holding onto William P, who was walking on huge stilts, and we were walking through a down town area where the ground had been dug down four stories, and you could see four underground levels on the buildings and sky scrapers that surrounded us.  As we walked over a big dug out area where many workers were, he  told me some kind of secret…. I tied my pubic hair in a knot, and he said, thats the first thing I did when I learned this information too.

At one point I was in some kind of club.  There were two boxes of tea.  One was Zac's, and one was Jill's.  I figured they probably wouldn't notice if I made myself some tea.  Then everyone showed up.  I was trying to explain to Erin K about this tobacco paste, or some other sticky brown paste that people rubbed on cigarettes.  Gregorio G showed up, and everyone (Jill and others) was eating a big plate of beans and greens and rice that I had made.  Gregorio was talking about how he was getting so many clients by being a part of this community.  I told him, I was glad for him, and also new, that I was benefiting even more.

Earlier I had been walking across a big concrete expanse the day after homecoming at a major University. I though how ironic that I never party with people but do find myself up early walking through the mess they leave.  There was some sense that I was trying to participate more than I did the last time through college.

Ben Peck was going to the University and there was some discussion about his studies.  His mom had some expectation for him.  He seemed to be doing very well at meeting this.

Three dreams, difficult to remember.

Was at some kind of large event.  HArd to remember the details, but a sense that there were many people that I respect there.  At some point I stepped outside when George got there.   We went and sat down at a pick nick table on the side of the building.  J was very busy and had scheduled 4 massages.  She had painted a symbolic calendar in big artistic looking symbols with dark colors.

I went out to the front yard of a big old house on a hill.  I had been doing some gardening and growing vegetables in the front yard.  There was something interesting about the soil, a certain feeling to it.  Charged, but not entirely pure.

I pulled up the pickup truck at "my house" which was a farm.  There were lots of people there.  I had Sadie.  Uncle JJ was there and wanted to let Sadie and his horses run and play.  I was concerned about having Sadie off leash because she might bite someone.  I went into the house and found a choke chain, that was pretty useless to me.

Some Strange and Various Travels

Dreamed that I was taking a picture of a shaman reflected in a mirror.  Then went and started talking to Mao.  Realized that we had been friends and associates in a past life.  Long history of adventure.  His phone rang, and he started talking to his son.  As I was on the way out, I grabbed a pinch of doe white granules that were in a bowl.  I was very aware of the taste, and it filled me with a nostalgia.

Earlier I had been walking up a sidewalk along the side of a park with Alex, and Kaya.  We had been smoking schwag.  We were walking with 2 other people.  One was Matthew T from ceremony.  They pulled out there weed and it was bright red and glowing.  Then through the night came a delivery truck, blaring cumbia music.  It was decked out with christmas lights and psychedelic elements like the busses in D.F.  My awareness followed him down the street as the truck turned.  I was aware of the driver, and that he worked nights.  That he had a family.  What he looked like.  I was thinking that the low bass that (sub woofers) that I hear late a night is not from boom cars all the time, but actually from trucks like this.

I walked up a long hill.  Past someone (a landlord?) who i had a conflictive history with, but was now on good terms with.  She was raking leaves.  I kept going higher up the hill, and walked up to a party.  I was in AVL.  This was a party of the AVL's successful.  Hip business owners and the like.  A guy came up to me and greeted me in a foreign language.  He said "blahblah ajo".  I don't remember the first part, but recognizing "Ajo", I assumed it was a Native American language.  He informed me that it was hindi.  He seemed to be from Israel, and honestly I didn't trust him entirely.

Earlier I had had a very strange dream.  I was in a shower at a locker room with lists of other men, (although I'm not sure I really had a body) and they were talking about their penis'.  On of them was uncircumcised and they were having a conversation about it, but the penis grew and undulated like an earth worm.  It wasn't disturbing, just strange.

A Movie at the Greyhound Station.

I was at the bus station with J.  We were on our way to Omaha to visit my family, and were waiting for a bus somewhere in the middle.  There was along line in the lobby and a long wait.  Luckily they had a movie theatre in the back.  Some 70s movie like the kind they used to play on channel 9 when I was a kid was playing, and the room was filled with mostly black people.  J was seated when I walked in the room.  Because there wasn't a seat next to her, we got up and moved down the row.  We were blocking some peoples  view of the screen, and I pulled out a chair for here and then sat down…. Wait… There was puke all over her chair.  Luckily she didn't sit down, I warned her in time, but I got puke all over my hands.  I walked back out into the lobby.  I went to the desk.  The first guy I saw helped someone else, but another guy walked up and was like "can I help you?"  I explained the situation saying, that it was a human trap, because it looked like a chair, but there was puke in, it, but the natural human exaction was to sit down in the puke.  I was very angry.  He calmly took me to the rest room, where I washed my hands.  As I washed my hands I began to feel better.  I actually started singing to my self, and wondering how we were going to make it to Omaha.  Where would we eat when we got there.  Was there a coop?  I realized we had a car, and so could drive down our selves.  The bus station employee had been patiently waiting for  me the whole time I had been washing my hands, again and again.  I finally felt clean and I told him thanks.  He then grabbed some clueing products from the back of the men's rest room and headed out to clean up the puke.  I went back into the theatre.   J had found a seat in the bak row, and was scrunched in sideways, trying to get comfy so she could rest even sleep.

Earlier I had gone to her house.  We had separated, and I had gone to see the kids, though I still loved her.  I was afraid she had a new man in her life.  When I got there the kids were running around.  I love them but I wanted to see her.  I went to the back bath room, and she came out.  She didn't have a new boyfriend, at least that I could see.  I was relieved and wanted so much to get back together.  We talked.

Barefeet on Concrete, so Vivid

Last night the dreams were very vivid from the earliest I remember I was on a street, and I had a childs tennis racket.  Someone was hitting tennis balls long, and I tried to retrieve it.  I didn't have the hand eye coordination to hit the ball.  An old woman came out of here house like (what is all that noise).  I was barefoot walking across the city with Misha now.  There was some kind of event going on, people everywhere.  We ducked into a friends house, someone we new slightly from South High.  I talked to her and even though she was not physically beautiful, I made an effort to let her know that I valued her presence as a divine human being.  I said we should hang out at a coffee shop or something.  I tried to put on my shoes to leave, they were new fancy sandals with string attached on the soul.  I was concerned they would break…. They must have broke because then I left, carrying Edwin out onto the street barefoot.  It was like Bloomington and Lake and the street was all eaten up from construction.  My feet hurt on the hardness of the concrete, with every step.  I had to be very mindful with each step looking where I place my foot.  Extremely vivid.

Then we found J.  We reminisced on when we first meant and then began to make love.  I was very cautious to go slow so we didn't orgasm.  And we made beautiful love, and didn't go over the edge.  At one point James and Matthew Tabaka walked by outside with a big group.  They were right outside our window, only separated by a screen.  I pulled a blanket over me and Jaina so they would look in and see us.

Earlier I had been in a big condo, maybe my parents.  Cousin Tanya was there in the prime of her beauty and she had rotweiler puppy.  Aunt  Susie and grandma Dorris showed up.  There was some dynamic, but I can't put my finger on it now.

William, Stoma, and Yoji

I was driving my truck through the trails at mini haha falls with the intention of filling up water at a spigot in the woods.  A park ranger informed me that I couldn't drive in the falls.  I tried to convince him to let me, but he wouldn't say yes.  I noticed there was a pipe with water coming out in the rangers office, and I pushed it back onto a shelf (it had been pouring onto the floor. (in protest)

The madness started, when William was demonstrating, how he could hang from one foot, from a trailer house that was tipped on its front end and rose upwards like a mini sky scraper.  I was up there with him, as well as some other students, and it was making me very nervous.  I kept looking down, and was sitting on the bumper, which swayed as I moved, and the whole set up felt horribly wrong.

At some point the whole contraption turned into a hot air balloon, and the whole group lifted off and flew over a park, with people like my neighbors in Lynhurst, who ooohed and ahhhh'd.   It became Stoma who was the teacher and I realized that he had requested a hot air balloon.

I was in some kind of post war anarchy, with someone like Stephen cox, and he was looking at out lawed video games, we were on a boardwalk by the ocean.  I tried not to look at the games thinking they must be either extremely violent or pornographic, but I was a bit curious.  Jaina came down a long narrow set of apartment stairs that led down to the street, and I went up with her.  She told me that she had taken 5 pills.  I was concerned for her, but she said she felt great and seemed really animated.  She was preparing a bath.

I walked down the hall a bit, saw Stephen Cox.  I was in a big school or university building with a front desk.  I realized I had my Berimbau.  It had a red chord attached to the bottom.  I walked down the hall, past a class that Stoma was teaching, and he commented about how I was holding a string instrument from Afghanistan.  I walked into a classroom, and Yoji had assembled a group of Capoeiristas and was giving a very motivational speech.  He had just come back from a trip to Bahia and was inspired.  I remember wondering how long that would last.  Then we were getting ready to play in a roda.  I didn't have the right close, but was wearing green army parachute pants over a pair of camo-sweat pants.  I wondered if I would have enough mobility.

At One point earlier I had been in a big class room.  And Jill Paquin was there, and I thought of here kindly, but she didn't speak to me at all, but at one point we were told to sit in a circle, and apparently I was sitting next to her friend, so I moved over to make space for her.

The Guru and Breathing Water.

was driving a motorcycle through the city.  Came to an icy parking lot where many people were standing around.  My wheels spun on the ice, and I basically got out and started pushing.  A young child came and started touching the back wheel saying "cool".  I was afraid he would get hurt so I kept telling him to move away.  His dad, and some other people came up aggressively mad at the way I was talking to him.  I was so angry.  Then I stopped and looked at them.  They shrunk down to being a foot and half tall and the dream went totally 3D lucid style.  I said " I know who you are, you are the Guru".  They laughed and agreed, and then vanished.

I had been wandering with George and MAx, but we were back home.  I felt a longing to be accepted by Max.  He couldn't hang out because so many other people demanded his attention.  We stood sheltered from the rain in an entrance to some strange building, by an roofed parking lot.

Later I lead him through a "campus" an old run down mansion where George taught, there were academic things stashed everywhere.

I was swimming with friends and family at a big river cut in steep rock with waterfalls everywhere.  I was doing headstand underwater when I realized I could breathe underwater.  I showed others.  They were amazed.  Finally I was asked to demonstrate in front of a group of suits in a hotel, face down in the sink.  No problem.  I knew it was because I was slightly stuffy that the water released air which I could breathe.

Some Dreams..... Subtle sense of watching "I"

I was in some upper realm,  I got there by climbing a ladder.   Through an old abandoned building, going up onto a wooden loft and climbing out through a window.  Outside it was very bright.  My old roommate Mary was there telling me about how she hired someone to be basically here stripper,and that I could do the same.... The person she had the arrangement with was doing some kind of dance.  We were in some kind of abandoned city.  I was walking on stilts.  My energy may have been slightly pulled, but I said "No thanks, I'll stay celibate".  I walked over broken concrete slabs on the stilts, at one point picking up more and ore speed.  When I got back to the window to get down, it was not covered by branches, someone had put there.  I moved them to the side.  As I opened the door people were coming out.  They had a huge long ladder going all the way from the ground floor to the window, because someone had pulled the ladder up to the wooden loft up.  I put everything back in order.

I walked into a room, and Ben and Alex Eaton were there.  I pinned them to the couch, and held them down.  Some one threw a small "sword" made out of the leaf of a plant to Ben, but I intercepted it, and it turned into a long wooden sword.  All in play, I thrusted using Warrior three, Warrior two and Warrior One.  No one else was amused.  I was a picture that Annie Rollins had posted on some social networking site I'd never heard of.  It had a purplish quality and was of a huge pyramid with a small somewhat primitive town landscaped all around it.  It looked beautiful, ancient and mysterious.  As I zoomed into the picture I could see more and more detail.... A truck drove through a tunnel at the very bottom of the pyramid, which turned into a huge church.  Now "I" was standing outside the pyramid talking to some people.

Earlier, I had been at some kind of event, workshop, or something.  I had had the car all packed up and ready to go.  It was maybe a Yoga event that Jaina and I had been to.  She was somewhat disapproving and really wanted to take off.  People were still hanging outside the house.  There was something to do with the hose.  I felt a feeling of indebtedness.

Sorry if I Bit Your Finger

She was very active last night.... I feel that I have found a method for allowing the waves.  Meditation 9-10 on an empty stomach and then sleep 10:00-11:00 at which point wake up, or become aware of the waves.... Fell easily into the vastness a number of times.... This all went on till 12:40 or so, at which point made the resolve to fall asleep....

Don't know at what point sleep hits, but on these nights of so much awareness, it is hard to discern... at any rate, I found myself walking with my kids on a concrete covered landscape.  Misha had lost a shoe, so we had gone back to look for it.  Finally found it and made our way to some kind of store front or house..... outside there was a street with a bus stop and people waiting for the bus.  Aima and Asata kept going outside and I was afraid they would be kidnapped.  I went outside too, and stood on the bus stop, at which point I remembered that I had been working with the waves and meditating.  I realized this was a dream, and looked around the dream world in amazement.  I touched the street with my hands.... As I touched it sent Kundalini electrical thrill waves through my spine, almost unbearably.  I stood up and approached one of the people at the bus stop, a tall woman in a long rain trench coat.  At first we talked, but at some point I bit he finger.... Then mayhem, I realized I was biting Jaina's finger, and I was still laying in bed meditating.  She screamed, and I explained that I was sorry I was dreaming..... We were in our house, which was a one story, multi level place, and I tried to tell her about my dream, but she was talking over me, I got angry at her.

Maybe it was the night before, I had dreamed that I was driving the minivan , or walking in "Asheville", our house on Houston street was up a long winding hill lined with stately old houses that had fallen into some disrepair.  I was at the intersection of a busy commercial area, hip, like old Dublin with pubs and little shops.  2 guys walked up and in a flash, one grabbed my fanny pack.  I tried to hold on but as I did the other one slashed at me a long swipe with what I assumed was a knife.  I let go of the fanny pack and they ran away.  I walked into a pub, and outside there were street musicians busking, they were from Minneapolis.  I was terribly impressed with their music, and tried to talk to the bass player, he was a bit reserved.......

3 teachers who have showed up recently.

I was in One Yoga.  I had gone up to the desk to get something, and Jaime was there.  A workshop let out, and guest teacher was an large African American woman with dreadlocks.  She sang.  She was intuitive.  She told me that what I most needed to know was that I need to be "closer" to my enemies.  I intuitively could see, that I had been standing tight at arms reach, the perfect place for them to fire blows at me.  By stepping closer I would block their ability to attack.  But who are my "Enemies"?  It was the same One Yoga where I had drank Celia's magic water in an earlier dream.

I was at some kind of lecture.  The speaker was a Native American, 60, ponytail, barrel chested.  He was explaining that there is more water in Minnesota than anywhere else on the earth.

Stoma and heart of Thuja.

Doctor Parker had revealed to me and Trevor Tice, the correct way to harvest the Heart of Thuja.  You dug around the the roots, and then in the roots was a living kinesthetic heart which reached out towards you.  He took a shoe horn and popped the heart out.  Trevor greedily grabbed the heart.  I looked in the space where the heart had been and it was like an Alex Grey painting.  a Million eyes started back at me from infinity.  I realized the consciousness and properties of the Thuja (Cedar) Heart.

Also, with out remembering the specifics, I am aware that Yoji has been present in my dreams as a teacher lately too.  In fact.... I went to Capoeira, but didn't have the right clothes.  The school was in a different place Alex was there and Jose, and Dave.  I talked to Yoji.

I went to the new studio of my teacher from Capoeira Asheville ( I can't remember his name).  It had and incredible back yard with grass....

Bramacharia, DK, Costa Rica.

At one point I was walking through this youth center in a housing projects, it was very crowded.  I was carrying a MPC that someone had taken to the wrong place.... I saw kids outside playing basketball.  Other kids were inside a class room in the dark working on the new MPCs, which were attached to computers.  At one point I was walking around the side, and saw Demetrius.... HE was talking about how he tried to preserve his seed, but couldn't go longer than 2 weeks.  I was so relieved that someone else was going through the same thing and it made me feel "normal".  I expressed that I would be doing fine till I went to sleep, and he and TK laughed.

Earlier I had been in Costa Rica with Jasvir, and some other people.  We had spent sometime trying to convince a Missionary that we would share some skill with the locals.... He was an oppressive missionary and didn't want to empower them, so we got an left.  As I was leaving I remember walking up a path, and there were women all around me.  One of my Yoga students, a guy from the yoga center of Minneapolis was there, and he had found 2 huge Mangos along the way.  I started loking tin the trees for Mangos.  We were in a place that Jaina and I were staying now, and there were Papayas stashed on high shelves.  Then I started interviewing Alex Rand's dad about what he wanted from his life.  Alex was explaining that his dad always stayed in the same hotel in Costa Rica.

I dreamed about my parents but don't remember what.  There was also some kind of subtle organization which made much sense to me.

Prison stories

Startd in a prison.... Me and a bunch of other people were all packed into one cell... I had apparently spent the last year in there and was telling peple what it would be like... We were packed in like sardines, leaning over the top of some kind of shelves.  I went on some kind of mission, snuck out to see Aima, went to her childrens house room.  Then I went to try to see Jaina.  I saw here across a shopping mall, aparently thats where the prison foo was served.  I tried to approach her, but ended up in a really long line.  I saw her sit under a wooden rain structure type thinig, and I went over to see her.  She was surrounded by CorePower girls and I could barely say a thing to her.  I missed her.

Then we were walking, I had been apparently shipped to MExico and was with a group of mexican prisoners.  The guy  who changed my oil at Valvoline in MExico seemed to be running the show.  It was like a class room.  I found a book on Native Americans and decided I was going to learn while I was in there.

It turned out that we were slave labor forced to work at a fast food chain that served dead human bodies.... Like Secret Burger.  WE procesed and did all the dirty work in the back.  The first time I ate the food I was really resistant,  thought I would puke, but my friends on the job dished me up a big serving of the extra indulgent fries and somecream of broccoli soup with little chunks of "meat" in it.  I had not had protein for so long that even though it disfusted me my body was thankful for food.

At some point down the line they put us up in an old house... It smacked of poverty but we were psyched to have something of our own.  At one point I was pulling, junk, old baby dolls and such out of cracks in some wooden stairs.  The back entrance had at one time had beautiful panelled windows looking outto the ocean, but had since been repaired with any materials that they could just tack together.

When I went to the front of the house though it looked like a luxury mansion.  It turned out I was living there with Ben Vincent.  He was talking about how Angela smoked hash and it was contrary to his Yoga practice but he gave her the space.

I realized that since we had a mansion on the ocean in MExico we could rent it as a vacation home.  I discussed the ida with some people, they were skeptical but I was gong to role with it.

There was some kind of gathering.  A powerful African Elder with drea locks was there.  I sat down next to him.  My left leg started to float.  I laughed, and my leg got lighter and lighter till it lifted my whole body into a handstand.  I pulsed tiny handstand pusheups... resonating some type of energy.  It had that strange powerful sensation to it of other spirit dreams.
Ben vincent
Hand Stand Pulses


Running through the night no passport.
Air Plane with "prayer" room in the back.

Celia's Magic Water

I meditated for a while,, then took shavasana, then rolled over into fetal position where I fell asleep.  In dream that followed shortly.....


I was at One Yoga, I thought to teach a noon class, but when I went into the room, Jessa was standing at the front of a packed sanctuary teaching a Yoga class with weights.  I went out into the lobby and saw that there were two classes going on.  One was Mario's, which in my haste I had thought was mine, and the other one said Celia's Magic water.  Now I had seen Celia's magic water before bottled, in little plastic bottles (in another dream) and I had read the label and it said never goes bad.  I had laughed to my self knowing that the water was leaching BPAs.  But Celia was in the lobby of one, right where the water machine was and there was a closet that dropped down four feet to some water in what seemed to be a basin inside a plastic shower structure.  I asked Celia, who was a 50 year old woman with piercing  eyes, and white hair, but very smooth tan skin, where her water came from and as I did, Michele was walking by and said "verdana".  Celia said,  I filled up when we in Verdana, the last time, but it remained unclear whether it was spring water or tap water.  She asked it I wanted to try it, and I was like, what the hell.  She dipped a large mesh strainer with a handle down into the water , scooped it back up and set it on my head.  She let it sit there about 30 seconds and then said there you go, and as she took it off I realized I couldn't stand up... I started shaking and pulsing and almost crying, and she said "let it go" and I rolled down to the right and began breathing fast and practicing Brahmari... faster and harder and I left my body and found I was riding a bicycle very fast down a hill, in a "dream world" and it was very intense to be there, and my body felt very intense and I was getting tired of doing Brahmari and I realized I didn't need to breathe... I was biking down a hill through a farmers market and there were Asian ladies selling bunches of greens and I rolled all the way to the bottom and turned to get off that road, and suddenly I was back in the lobby at One Yoga.  Jessa's class was ending and several students were leaving and were wearing costumes, of vikings, or medieval knights.    I talked with them about it and they said whats the fun of going to Yoga without a costume... and I said yeah, you might as well watch TV in your pajamas.  There was a blizzard outside, so one of the guys asked if I wanted a ride home.  We went outside (26th st. went East) and got in his car... As we did I saw a red car with three bucket seats where the windshield wrapped around the side of the seats, so the rider was in like a bubble.  We were driving east, the wrong way.  I mentioned that, and we turned off and pulled off behind my dad's church which he shared with 2 other churches, but it wasn't spring house.  I had a key, so we went in the back door.  In the room there was a table set, filled with plates and bowels of the most delicious looking bread.  I smell it.  It smelled amazing.  I wanted to eat some, but my friend was leaving so I grabbed a dinner roll.  It was so soft.  My friend walked out through the front door, and I followed him.  I had a black backpack and a brown wedge bag.  As we walked out the strong black guy with a long beard from Asheville who mowed all the lawns on Houston street was there.  He did maintenance for the church.  He asked me what I was doing with that back pack and I said, it was mine.  He looked at me suspiciously and I wondered what his deal was.  Then we went to go get in my friend's car.  The maintenance guy's black backpack and brown wedge bag were hanging on the door of his car.  I called him over and we laughed about how our bags were identical.  Then a car drove by with the radio on very loud, and a girl was singing even louder and out of key to a bass filed r&b song.  Some other pretty black girls getting into a car parked 2 in front of us laughed and said, she was ruining the song.  I joked that maybe she couldn't sing but with a voice that loud she should be able to get a job doing something.  They though I was flirting, and they ignored me, but as we were driving away I noticed they were looking at me.

 

Lori attacked by a Mob.....

This dream left me feeling sick, my body aching.  I was trying desperately to move out of 1411 Girard.  Mark and Lori had already moved into the house and were messing with my stuff, and saying rude things.  Lori (who wasn't physically the real lori, but a fat older later, who was very bullying and mean) was picking up my daughters stuffed animals and petting them.  I told her to put them down, because she was getting lead on them.  Ephraim was there to help me move.  I was angry because I felt like I was wasting his time, but was arguing with Lori.  I told her to leave, and she told my I hadn't paid rent. I walked out on the front porch, so angry, I was yelling.  There were about a hundred neighbors out in the street.  I yelled about how Lori had poisoned my kids with lead, and and not apologized, and put my family into a hard place, and now she was trying to get lead on their stuffed animals.  I went back inside.  Ephraim and I went upstairs to start moving stuff.... there was so much stuff, it was overwhelming ( IT wasn't really the layout of 1411).  Suddenly I heard yelling down on the street.  Lori had been arguing with the neighbors and now some woman was in her face yelling at her.  We went to the window.  There was a mob formed.  The woman was fat, and hit Lori in the head a couple of times, Lori went down.  Another guy started kicking Lori. really hard.  I though, he is going to kill her.  I started yelling out the window, and simultaneously trying to dial 911 on the phone.  A white guy got into the middle of the mob, to protect Lori, and after holding them back for a second, the mob rushed him to.  It was the full on expression of anger and frustration against the oppressors, or the symbol of oppression.  I fumbled with the phone trying again and again to dial 911.  Ephraim looked on.  I ran downstairs and tried to lock the front door.  Someone was trying to unlock it from the other side.  I held the dead bolt, but then they walked around to the other side of the room and could see me.  I finally surrendered and let them in.  It was 2 guys, a woman and her son.  They seemed to be high on something.  I took them upstairs to my bedroom, pretending to be friendly, but wondering what they were going to do.  My music studio was there.  It was to vintage for them to want to steal, so they sat down on the floor...  The son started playing my keyboard, and it sounded really good.  I was amazed how good my set up sounded, and how well it worked.  I felt horrible that I had incited the mob violence.  I wondered if that was a crime.  I hear people downstairs.  I went downstairs and Alex Rand was there dressed in his army surplus pants and a black hoodie, and gave me a huge bear hug.  The rest of the Capoeiristas were behind him.  They had come to help me move.  I felt a huge sense of relief.  Genje had brought blankets for my kids because he heard that ours were lead tainted.  I looked around the house,  there was so much to move.  Nothing was packed.

I woke up.

Earlier I had been playing with my daughters in the "basement" of my parents house (not the real basement).  Aima had smacked her head on the door frame and I was worried about her.  Ben was at the house and had a stomache virus.  I was worried about him and didn't want him to get the kids sick.

Both dreams were filled with an overwhelming tension, and resistance.

No Passport

It was night and me and a guy were running through the night time in a foreign country.... I was wearing a camouflage hat, and he had the rainbow hat of Kathy's.  It the guy turned into Max Groneck, and we ended up at an Arabic grocery store.  We were in a hurry and cut to the back of the store.  All the sudden I realized that what we were doing was catching a plane to france and then back home to the United States.  I realized I didn't have my luggage.... Then I realized I didn't have my passport.  Wait.... It was to late, I was on the plane already.   I yelled Emergency and ran back through various rooms of the plane, but by the time I got to the back room, we were already high in the sky.   The back room was the economy room and there were no seats, or seat belts.  A bunch of african, somalian and arabic people standing around.  I realized I wasn't even wearing a shirt.  I sat down in meditation position.  As the plane climbed upward, i had to lean forward.  While I meditated someone put a prayer rug underneath me.  I felt much calmer and realized I'd have to fly back to "Senegal" to get my passport and belongings.  At one point we arrived at an air port, and I was carrying around a five gallon bucked, a stuffed animal, and something else.... I didn't want to let go of or loose any of my possessions.

Earlier I fell.  I had been in deep dark sleep.  I had had a tiny bit of caffeine today, put 1 leaf of swamp tea in my tulsi.... I don't know if that is why.  New moon is tomorrow.

Vortex is back, 2nd night in a row.  Not in its full intensity, but It is there, with the fractured type shri yantra fractals where each triangle contains a photograph like image.  I have been very calm, simply observing and accepting what comes in these spontaneous late night meditations.

So here I am in a new cycle.

Stuff is moving, transforming..... Clearer and clearer experiences of oneness.

Lucid Dream... Shot, Herbs and Haunted Lyndale

I was supposed to do a massage for one of my clients.  He asked me to come to his house.  He lived on 51rst and bryant the first house on the south east corner of the intersection.  As he was unlocking his door I started to feel suspicious of him.  We went into his house, walked upstairs.  It was still dark I heard the clinking of alchohol bottles.  I turned on the light.  He was over by the stereo.  He turned around, pointed his gun at me and shot.  The bullet hit me in the rib cage.  I slumped over an easy chair pretending to be dead.  He approached my body, talking, about something.  As he came into reach I grabbed him and wrestled.  Next thing I knew I was running down  the street away. Then George was there.  I'd forgotten that I was shot, and was telling George about how I have been having lucid dreams.    In fact, this is one I told him.  I looked around.  It was a not quite complete dream world.  It was real enough though, and we ran up the alley.  I was filled with a sense of awe, not at the dream scape, but at a deep underlaying knowledge that I was dreaming... Of coarse I was.

Earlier I had been living in a big house.... Ascentia had come over and I was supposed to give some kind of herbs, I guess pot.   I had no interest in the stuff, but my herbs cupboard was filled with it.  It my bedroom from 4th grade.  There had been something about driving across the city in an old run down car.  There was something happening in Powderhorn... older families with kids.  I went to their house, and sat on the couch.  It was a sense of being at the house of someone I really looked up to.  His kids played really well... their friends came over and there was no crying or fighting.  I was impressed.  I sat the whole time, laying back on a couch tired, wanting to go to sleep.

At one point there was some festival.  There were lots of hippy, type stoner kids there.  I sat down in a posittion of status next to Zach C. who was free styling... and I gave him a bud... Somehow he worked it into his rhyme that he asked me what it was called and I said "Oz" which rhymed.

At one point I was in haunted Lyndale, a place I have often been... It is Lyndale church from when I was growing up, but a little bit bigger, darker and weirder.  Really has a presence in it, a little bit alive.

Funny, when I woke up I didn't remember any of my dreams.

The Affair

Meditated in the middle of the night....tried to move into the flow, but my efforts prevented me.... when the flow is this subtle it seems the number one thing is surrender.

Dreamed that I was in the basement.  The kids were sleeping, it was night.   J was a wake, and started to tell me something, then stopped.  In the dining room I told her she had to tell me.  I said are you having an affair, she said yes.  I stayed calm.  Have you had sex?  She said yes.  I got upset.  The heat rose in me, and I started yelling.  And stomping in the night.  When I went back downstairs Jaina had taken the girls.

It was early morning light now and I went upstairs.  J and the girls were sleeping in my parents room.

I was able to pull J aside.  I asked her if it was more than once.  She said yes.  I asked her who it was.  She said Nguyen,  I thought she said Jim,  Grupper.  She said he looked just like me.  She told me he had the title of Dr. but wasn't a real Dr.   She told me that every week when I thought she was teaching, she would rent a canoe and they would make love in a lake.

I was crushed.

Trying to figure out what to do, because I love my kids so much and didn't want to be away from them.

I heard her on the phone with her mom, she was taking the kids over there.

I desperately scanned through my mind trying to think about how I could get even.



Earlier, I had been on the back of a motorcycle Jaina was driving.  Kaya was there and as WE drove away I gave him the peace sign.  We were driving through something cross between housing projects and a State fair ground.  The Air was granular and thick.

Then I was in an italian restaurant with many friends.  An Italian celebrity and his body guards, who we knew came in.  We nodded to each other.  Matt Los Rachel's husband was telling a story about having seen a film star, loudly by the bar, and was so engulfed in the story that he didn't notice the celebrities in the restaurant until they were on their way out.

Puzzling sequence OBE2

Puzzling sequence of events.....

I was in Sunday morning Shavasana.

I started to feel the buzzing in my body.

After about the third wave I decided to "Slip through" and breathed in the way described by Michaels monk.

I don't know when I crossed over, but The intensity became very great, the body rocking, waves and waves of intensity, also with the pain and heavyness in my legs and arms.... With my eyes closed I saw Shri Yantra, Glowing, and spinning, Like a vortex, I felt as if I was being drawn into it.  I heard the nada so loud it occured to me it could damage my hearing.  At one point I realized I was lying with my right leg in Virasana, and my left leg across imy leg in Pidgeon.  I was confuse.  How did This happen.  I heard someone in the room moving around.  I became slitghtly alarmed, because I was in Shavasnaas and felt vulnerable, but I didn't want to open my eyes because it might distrub the intensity of the meditation.  Finally I lifted my head a litlle and slightly opened my eyes... My legs were back in shavasana.

Next thing I remeber I was walking through the hallway outside the studio, it was time for class.  There was a table with 2 chairs by the lobby desk.  There were two people sitting there, dressed all in black, with balck ninja masks covering their faces.  They looked at me,  I looked at them and smiled warmly.  Laura Good was behind the desk.  She was concerned about her diet and wanted support.  Then I realized I'd forgotten "yoga pants" and rushed up a ramp into Jaina and my dorm room,  The kids were playing on the floor, a Huge woodeen door was leaning on a chair,  and I told Jaina if it fell on one of our kids it could kill them..... 

Then I was back in Shavasna on the floor at one.  That is all.

Energetic Slides...

Getting So Subtle... There was something about slides.... very energetic, and energetic slide from one place to another.... The locations corresponded to times and places from consensual reality....  Jaina was trying to explain how you use the same energy as we use for sex, to meditate deeper in a way that allows us to move along these invisible energy lines.... Somehow I fell.

I was at a swimming hole... some guy was trying to explain to me how to jump from a concrete ledge, over a bunch of really hard concrete things to the next... There was a stairway that went all the way to under the swimming hole... in the middle of the water, with a hall way protected from the water.... I thought they must need a huge underground concrete place because they are Jewish.  The Guys mom was there, trying to encourage me to jump.  It looked dangerous but everyone assured me it isn't.

Then I was at someone's wedding.  The Eatons had made the food.... turkey.  I went looking for dark meat but couldn't find it.  Sitting at the banquet, Tim Rehbourg started saying really wise things, when put on the spot for a toast... Then he started trying to sell level2 CPY trainings... I got irritated.

Earlier, I was in some woman's house.... Like Ruth Lorden, she was psychic, I was trying to make tea.  I had my kids.  I didn't entirely trust the woman, but wished I could.  Something about me and the twins  had to go on some kind of journey.

There was some story about a young guy who liked a girl and they wanted to date, but her father wouldn't permit it... Here is the trick though.... The young boy had a long tail which his ancestors were attached too.  It was me, I was in the park and meeting the girls father for the first time.... When he saw me from the front he thought (what a nice looking young man), but then I had the long purple tail, 100 feet long with full size humans attached at the waste to it.  They were talking constantly.

Jaina and I were climbing into a hummer together talking about a business plan.

Jaina and I had a date lined up.  WE lived in a house where we each had our own apartment.  I also had a tiny little room I used for are, music, and creative things.  I was afraid of something outside so at night when I would go in I'd lock the door.

There were magical, or multi dimensional bandits who had stolen something from my mother or grandmother.   Me and My 2 brothers were going through an attic, commenting on how we wanted to catch the villain who had been steeling from our matriarch.

I was at whole foods... with Lisa and Jaina.  The Cashiers were all talking behind Lisa's back calling her a slut.  I persisted in being her friend.   When I tried to tell Jaina about the interaction she said not to repeat it because it is gossip.

Dodgeballa And Chocolate Cake

I was in a huge empty banquet hall with my moom.  There were high class gourmet barbeque cooking on tables.  It was her favorite resteraunt.  They served me a head of lettuce, and I ate it leaf by leaf with my hands, Mom and the waitress told me to use a fork....  Later on, I realized that Jaina and I had made a chocolate cake and put it in the cupboard... I was eating delicious chocolate cake... I shared a little kitchen space with Aaron Anderson.  Back in the banquet things erupted into a doge ball game with Aima and Asata and Michael Monsoor... I was cleaning up.  Every time Michael tried to hit me with the doge ball, I caught it.

At some point was driving back to south high.... Driving the Van, kids were piling up in the street blocking me.  Jaina had to go somewhere so I stopped the car so she could get out.  She had her bags and would be flying on an airplane, so I told her to be safe.  I then went up and set up a table outside the school, selling something.  There were people with tables on either side of me.  Ended up meeting a lunch lady who was part of a cult.... They spelled out the gurus name in gold letters, and then the local guru interpreted the meaning, based on if the letters chosen had certain numbers in the corner.  They encouraged me to take a stab at spelling out the gurus name.  I was aware they might be full of it, but tried to remain open.

Drama at the Retreat Center

We were at a retreat center in Mexico.  The first night I got there I was lead with a group into a shallow pond by the facilitator.  He was moved around in the water, but there was a slippery path of sorts made up of rocks sticking out of the date, and the trick was that we would stick to the path until we realized there was no way to be there, but to get wet.  The facilitator was a small thin white haired man, much like the Italian who came to my Yoga class last night.

At one point some guys wrestling slammed into Misha and he hit his head on the floor.  I was very angry at them and was going to tell their group leader until I realized that they were in my group.  The I gave one of the guys a Chappa, as as he walked out the for, not to hurt him so much as express my anger.

Went with Jaina and the kids to a dinner type event with Corepower.  Mattie Weis showed up and stuck a paper at my neck, slicing me, giving a paper cut.  I was very angry at her and searching fo ways to punish her, told her she couldn't come to my Yoga class anymore.  Jaina and I got into a conversation with Labron James... He was rapping, and I sensed trying to impress Jaina... I asked him if the beat was by Ninth Wonder and he said that yes it was.

Then I got into a conversation with some rapper who was young.   In the background there was an initiation ceremony taking place mostly with African American Males, but some white guys who loved Hip Hop.  During my conversation I noticed that Jaina had left.  I had started to talk about the 5% nation, and the conversation ended on an awkward note.  I left the meeting room.  In the lobby there were serving a dessert of blueberries and Yogurt.  I asked them f it was vegan.  They said no.  They sad they could make me one that was 10% vegan.  I made a fuss about how I couldn't eat it, but then grabbed a handful of the non-vegan food secretly on my way out the door (hmmmm).

Walked across the grounds.  There were police with drug dogs walking around.  The dogs kept sniffing me, and then biting an ore that I was carrying.  Finally I chased them off.  I realized we were in Mexico and had driven there in Ascensia's VW Bus that she owned.  I walked to where Jaina was, but ended up at the bottom of a hill along the water, pilled with stone yard sculptures potted plants, buddha sculptures and other outdoor decorations.  I climbed up through the things, having to move stuff around to get through finally coming out on the lawn outside where Jaina and the girls and I were staying.

She was surprised to see me coming out of the weeds and not on the path.  She told me that Jared brewing ton had said I grabbed his weenie.  I got really mad and said that was BS.  That he used to do that in Jr. High, hit you and when you went after him say stop trying to grab my weenie, really loud.
I felt insecure, like I did in Elementary school, Jr. High.

I started confessing something to Jaina and apologizing (something little) and she told me you don't have to say this, because I had an affair.... I said when, she said over a year ago. I was in shock... surprised.  I puzzled should I try to have an affair to get here back, but now on the bramacharya path that was not attractive.  I realized that who I would be hurting was me.  Should I restructure the relationship?  No clear answers came, but I was filled with a feeling of insecurity and inadequacy.

insights...

I remember now that many of the feelings of insecurity that I felt in this dream were my reality in the years of elementary school, high school and after.  All of the the confusion, and loneliness, and fear of being young.  I have a strong sense, that many of my karmas were expressed just at that young age, and now remain dormant until I am young again.  I pray that my yoga efforts help to purify this suffering and in someway move me beyond this.

I understand 2 paradigms... One is try to rise up in power in the world.... This is temporary.  Each life time we are thrown into the mix again, and destined for more suffering.  The other paradigm is to get off the train.  To cease to place importance on the dramas of human life and instead focus on yoga.  To cease to spend energy trying to reproduce, and instead move towards liberation.  In this way the "body" that my awareness rides would cease to exist.  What would become of my awareness?  Would it just take a new body?  Would I be trapped in limbo?  I realize I have fear and insecurity around this issue of being human.

I understand now that music begins as the expression of the human mating dance.  People of African Origin have a beautiful gift for making such music.... so beautiful that not just women, but men are attracted to the art they create.

My power manifests later in life.  As a young person I did not have charisma to interact with my fellow young people... as an adult I have set up a paradigm where I have something that others want.... i.e. Yoga, and so they have to respect me for my accumulated efforts.  I sense that this has been a pattern before for me.  That I begin life, the insecurities and struggles of being young with out much confidence, but then have a "longevity" or am able to manifest personal power more abundantly as life continues.

The practice would be to purify the seeds of immense suffering that afflict me when I am young.

Don't Be irreverent to Multi Dimensional Beings.

Started at a Party in some friend from high school's basement.  Helen was there, JP, Connor, Will Alex Eaton, Andrea.  Everyone was lounging around, until we got hungry... then went upstairs... The parents who owned the house were in a big project in the kitchen so we went and made food downstairs.... The parched corn (hominy) I had soaked had split and become huge rice cracker shaped paddies... Whoa.  Eventually we let, walking down the street.  Blackberries hung from the trees.... I was walking with these kids and they stopped to go into some restaurant like... Seward cafe, but I kept walking and then there was a tree with blackberries hanging across the street.

Walked my friends to some kind of theatre party.  I couldn't go in because I wasn't part of the theatre but a party had leaked out of the front door, and people were hanging in the front.  There was an obese girl lying on a bed in front of the house.  She rudely asked me to step aside as I was "blocking her view".  We started talking.  She had assumed that I didn't want to talk to her, but I had thought she was sleeping, so hadn't tried.  She explained that she was a protitute, and was well on her way to having over a million dollars.... She expected to live comfortably the rest of her life and had a financial plan to stop "working" in 2 years.....

Finally I went into the party... it was kind of secret club house of these kids.  Omaur was there.  A pretty girl of ambiguous race was the center of attention.  They wanted to make a video of her where she looked like a native, so they pained charcoal lines downward across the corners of her mouth... Omaur was trying to get her to do something... She sat on the floor and began talking in the strangest language... It was like the sounds she was making were frequencies... They were so beautiful, like cooing... complex but flowing, the tone was indescribable.... other worldly....  I reached for my digital recorder in my pocket... It was cracked in the middle, but on... It had been recording.   I listened to the recording.... It had not captured the cooing, and now she had stopped.

Then a Tatwa filled my awareness... It was a mandala, brown, four sided and in the center it said go inwards...

A story unfolded about this group of young adults who had access to a portal to other dimensions.  They had a social circle of about 20 people and would throw parties and then some of them would go through the portal... usually to have some kind of sexual adventure.  Ephraim was the bar tender.... They were silly about it and would dress up in cowboy hats... They had used the portal many times and always returned safely.  They had become ireverent.  The world in through the portal was somehow related to this reality but different.  I went with them this time.  We appeared down on strain yard.  There was an older species, with far greater consciousness than humans who used train tracks, had strange looking trains with disco style shapes and colors.   One of my group knocked one of the trains off the track.  (They were relatively small.)  The trains then morphed into armored warriors like rainbow stormtroopers and looked over at us assessing the situation.  One of my group (in fact a student from yoga who drinks quite a bit) Gave the soldiers the finger as we walked away from the scene.  Instantly they started to chase us.  We ran.... up some steep stairs out of the valley.  Our multi dimensional pursuers closing the gap.  Reached the top, jumped across a chasm to a market where humans in old style clothes were going about their business.

Everyone wore an ID tag.  I realized I would be caught without one... Just then, my friends walked up with an ID tag, irreverent as ever.  They gave me the tag.  I read the name on it, it was not a name I have ever hear... Like Drove Erhd or someting.....  My friends laughed about how we had escaped the storm troopers...

Then scene change... I was in a field with one of the friends outside of two immense abandoned houses.... He was screaming in tarrified horror un controllably.  Coming out of the house were huge ugly, swarthy men in wife beaters, with balled heads, tattoos, One was an 8 foot tall 275 pound police oficer.  They kept coming out of the house, limitlessly, one after another.  They had torn to shreads the kid from core power, and wouldn't rest till we were all dead.  They punched their fists, and snarled, as they opured out of the house, more and more.  I started to realize that this entity that took the form of the train was not limited to a particular shape like humans are....  We ran... through some woods, a dreary winter looking landscape minus snow.  Everything dead.

Then WE had come to a huge cliff... Somehow we tricked them to run after us and over the cliff, everylast one fell hundreds of feet, smashing to their death on the rocks below (Like Lemmings).  The camera pulled back and the scene was something off of the coast of hawaii.  Beautiful rocks, crashing ocean.  One rock lying down by the water looked like Bob Marley.  Words flashed across the scene "Who so ever diggeth the pit, shall fall in it".  I instinctively chimed in... If you want a big tree.... you need a small axe.  We were in a dark movie and this was a movie me and my friends had been watching... We all laughed.

Bob Marley's Secret Library.

Was in some mountainess area..... Jaina wanted to take the back door into One Yoga.... It was in the back of our house.... We used to be able to go through a closet and end up in One Yoga, but now they put and old door covered in chipping lead paint.  I finally got to One, had to close up.  I was eating something with a peel like chestnuts or oranges.  Left on my bike, and niked through a winding line of energy which took to a place of African elders throwing a party.  Ended up being at Bob marly's Palace which was made out of White marble.  There was a wicked archeologist, who I guess I was down with by association.  At one point he and bob marleys two kids and I were stading on some stairs when he said "I've found it, Bob marley's secret library"/  Ie pulled a lever inside a fuse box, and metal gates closed access to the stairs.  A room spun a round and we had access to the secret library of bob marley.  Even though the elders who protected this place tried to get in, Bob had designed it so it was impossible to reach us.  I had a sense that I would be incriminated even though I hadn't known what was happening.  Upstairs, locked into the library me and Bob Marley's kids, a boy and a girl about 8 and 11 hung out and waited.  Is sensed that Stoma was watching the entire time.